{"id":1345,"date":"2004-01-28T14:36:48","date_gmt":"2004-01-28T18:36:48","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.yummy-wakame.com\/archives\/2004\/01\/28\/\/"},"modified":"2004-01-28T14:36:48","modified_gmt":"2004-01-28T18:36:48","slug":"1345","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/yummy-wakame.com\/weblog\/2004\/01\/1345\/","title":{"rendered":""},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"\/pics\/imaginary-stalker.jpg\" alt=\"Imaginary Stalker Boyfriend - Larry Bailey\" class=\"oldblogthumb\" \/><strong><a href=\"http:\/\/cgi.ebay.com\/ws\/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&amp;item=3171665951&amp;category=317\" rel=\"external\">Imaginary Stalker Ex Boyfriend on eBay<\/a><br \/>Starting bid:  US $4.99 <\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Are you tired of your parents\/friends teasing you about not having a &#8220;special&#8221; someone in your life??<br \/>Are you bored with your current lifestyle and wish to add some excitement to help pass the time??<br \/>WELL&#8230; I am offering my services for 1 Month as the FIRST Imaginary Stalker Ex Boyfriend on Ebay!!<\/p>\n<p><strong>My services will include (but may not be limited to):<\/strong><br \/>&bull; Emailing you on a daily basis (or more often if you so choose) and asking you where you&#8217;ve been all day and who were you with.<br \/>&bull; Mailing you 1 letter per week explaining why we shouldn&#8217;t be apart and what could happen if we stay apart much longer.<br \/>&bull; &#8220;Busting in&#8221; on your AIM or Yahoo chat sessions and &#8220;flipping out&#8221; because your talking to &#8220;other guys&#8221;. (We will have to set something up to work around each others schedules).<br \/>&bull; You will also receive a special Valentines card w\/ a letter proclaiming my &#8220;love&#8221; for you.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Now when people ask &#8220;Why don&#8217;t you have a boyfriend?&#8221;<\/strong><br \/>You can say &#8220;Because the last guy I went out with was like a freakin&#8217; Stalker&#8230;I am afraid to go through that again.&#8221;<br \/>They will say &#8220;BULLSH*T!!&#8221;<br \/>Then you whip out those letters and they read them and go &#8220;DAMN!!&#8221;&#8230;.nuff said?!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Imaginary Stalker Ex Boyfriend on eBayStarting bid: US $4.99 Are you tired of your parents\/friends teasing you about not having a &#8220;special&#8221; someone in your life??Are you bored with your current lifestyle and wish to add some excitement to help pass the time??WELL&#8230; I am offering my services for 1 Month as the FIRST Imaginary [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[212],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1345","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-blogalog"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/yummy-wakame.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1345","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/yummy-wakame.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/yummy-wakame.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yummy-wakame.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yummy-wakame.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1345"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/yummy-wakame.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1345\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/yummy-wakame.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1345"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yummy-wakame.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1345"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yummy-wakame.com\/weblog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1345"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}