Okay I know Im being cheeky and its not all British men, but why do so many of them love to spontaneously spit so much? I’m constantly having to dodge giant fermenting gob splats on the pavements and the offending snort-and-gob machines.

They also seem to have no problem with peeing on any public building/shop/toilet/beach/church/office on the way to and from the pub, at any time of day or night. Pungent fumes fill my bedroom every night when I open the windows to get some ‘fresh air’.

“A few years back, British Telecom, as part of its “exciting” “new” look, decided to remove the country’s distinctive red telephone kiosks. Admittedly, the kiosks had one basic flaw, which their designer, Sir Gilbert Scott, had not foreseen: The British were wont to use them as public toilets. This tended to discourage long phone calls. Nonetheless, the announcement of their demise prompted a public outcry: That’s to say, the British denounced the removal of their red kiosks for about ten minutes and then found somewhere else to urinate late at night.” (source)